Politically incorrect tales of the EU bureaucracy.

• Author: Mosettig, Michael D.
• Position: Life of a European Mandarin - Book review

Life of a European Mandarin

By Derk-Jan Eppink. Ianoo. 386 pages.

Two decades ago television viewers in Britain and the United States were alternately amused and appalled as they laughed through episodes of "Yes, Minister," a British situation comedy about the way government bureaucracies really work at the top among insiders. In the series, a clever, glib high-ranking civil servant named Sir Humphrey would run circles around his Cabinet minister, aware that his power came from institutional memory and career longevity while the minister, an elected Member of Parliament, would soon be off on other pursuits.

Now, a former civil servant of the European Commission has turned out on paper the Brussels equivalent of "Yes, Minister," an amusing memoir of how things work and don't work at the Berlaymont headquarters of the commission. Perhaps the Life of a European Mandarin can be worked up into a European-wide sitcom--"Yes, Commissioner"--though to be true to Brussels protocol it would have to be dubbed and aired in 23 languages.

Dutch journalist Derk-Jan Eppink writes from the perspective of the insider he became during a decade (1995-2005) spent on the staffs of two European commissioners, Dutchman Frits Bolkestein and Estonian Siim Kallas. They are named only on the book jacket and throughout the book, with few exceptions and for no apparent reason except perhaps to avoid the accusation of writing tattle-tale gossip, characters are identified only by their generic titles. Brussels denizens will no doubt know the names and for more distant readers the lack of names adds another element of mystery in an often amusing behind-the-scenes tale of an institution where the name of the game is intrigue.

From its opening pages, this memoir is unmistakably the product of a disillusioned idealist, a man who has become cynical about his field. Consider these points he makes about the pervasive double-talk (and even double-think) at Commission headquarters:

The European administration is a world of open doors, closed doors, side doors, back doors, revolving doors and even trap doors--enough to confuse even the most highly-skilled Polish plumber! The truth is never absolute and intrigue is sometimes healthy. Even the deliberate flouting of the Commissioner's own policy is occasionally beneficial providing it remains within limits. The Commission is a living compromise between Northern rigidity and Latin flexibility, between Protestant right-mindedness and Catholic...